I found my first piece of music writing ever today and edited the shit out of it

It's always encouraging to read a piece of old writing and think, "Hey, this isn't so bad after all. This is still important to me and I can edit this into something better." That's essentially what I did here. This isn't a review so much as it is a travelogue, detailing my first visit to one of my favorite venues.

Finishing Jessica Hopper’s collection of music writing and reading this piece made me realize how crucial the observations and experiences of a writer actually are when drafting a review. This is kind of a breakthrough for me. It seems like there’s a healthy balance between talking about the music, the experience, the crowd and how it plays into a greater culture. I want to push myself to write past the surface of what the music sounds like, focusing more on how it affects an audience, and remembering that that audience includes me too, and that it’s okay to be vulnerable as a journalist. This piece is more focused on how this show and its audience affected me in all of my naïve 18-year-old glory.

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All of the fans at this show were also musicians, and throughout the night they insisted on plugging their projects and bodies to me. By the end of it all, I concluded that all of these boys were reared to rock and I was deeply jealous. I guess no one really supports an innocent little girl’s wish to march across the stage at a bar and shred before the eyes of a swarm of men, singing, “Look at me.”

I guess most parents don't want to watch their children become sexualized half-adults, and unfortunately that's what happens when you put a girl on stage at a bar no matter the performance and I don't know how it got to be that way. So come high school, you learn your position- stand on the side of the stage with the black Xs on your hands and your dad in the back of the room, watch the boys on stage, and wonder who gave them the permission to play with such confiden